don't take shit from nobody

leilockheart =]

Q.真的

真的

我努力的仰着脸孔
试着让眼泪不往下流 别往下流
不安的感觉到什么
在我生活中不再相同 很不相同

想要说 却还沉默
伸出手 无法触碰

天空突然一片辽阔
原来你是真的已经离开我
在我不熟悉的世界过新的生活

闭上眼 让泪水滑落
此刻你已真的永远离开我
在另外一个没有我的世界 自由的走

v.last

so tmr will be my last exam which i will totally flunk. i don't even think super duper stoopid alan kan will be able to help me :( mechanical dynamics you make me so so so sad :(
zac and jeremiah wna drink tmrs =\ since we don't like beer zac and i are going to drink water and zac feels a tad naughty so he wants some lemon too :) sparkling water is soo gross ! bottled - still water ftw !!
zac says he assumed i liked sparkling cos i'm all posh and what not drinking tea with my pinky up in the air
and thuy today was like i thought you had a boyfriend! i was like no i'm single =) and she's like you look like those people with boyfriends -.- *sigh
and she said i looked gangster :( :( :( :(

after tmr...exams will be the least of my problems....there's so much to do and deal with =\ i gotta deal with dynasty stuff and 2011 stuff and family stuff and friend stuff sighs.
ooo on a happy note dear thuy has helped me finish off selling my tickets =] she's way too pro. my $15 batch one is officially sold out and my other $20 ones yay! thank you thuy <3
thank you stupid alan kan for helping me in cfp and mech =) epic love! cannot wait till next year =$ i'm considering deferring my finance units for you =$
end of second year is tomorrow kinda scary thinking about being a third year =o tricia's going to be a fresher as well =\ wonder what will happen...mother says she'll end up not seeing both us at all next year haah guess we'll see =) april two thousand and eleven marks the cutting down of metros hopefully =]
i shall try and not procrastinate any longer...mechanical dynamics you are going to make me cry tomorrow!

reality strikes.

leilockheart

v.stoopid

things can only get better. you've gotten past this  point before and i'm sure you can pass it once again. for now, all you can do is cry it all out and get it out of your system where you have no more tears to shed and you become tired of wasting your sadness tears and everything on him. the rest of us can only be a shoulder for you to cry on. no matter what we say it won't make the hurt go away, no matter what we do that person will still be on the back of your mind. so all that is needed is either a rebound =x for distraction or to live with it till time heals the wound. you've had a slip up and even though you thought you could handle it you couldn't. saying i told you so isn't really going to change anything so hopefully this is just another mistake you learn from. i know his attention and presence makes you happy but that happiness won't last and i think you know that now. you have said you're stupid which i do believe you are at times but when it comes to your heart and your love nothing can stop you.

just breathe. it'll hurt. but you can only get stronger from this.

v.fefe dobson

so i found a new song that i really love

stuttering - fefe dobson


it was the music act for the latest episode of hellcats.
i don't know why i love the song so much =\ i mean the lyrics don't really apply to me but i guess i like the melody and instrumental =] but yeah i love it muchly :) jackie and jess love it muchly too
jackie's favourite line "there's a whole lot of things that i will forgive but i just can't take a liar"

it's you and me against the world

that's what you said

if you can't be honest with me 

i'm afraid this is the end

hurry up hurry up

if you ever really cared about me

tell the truth, give it up

you sound guilt cos you're stuttering

;)

just maybe

shallow-ness

v.prepare

so today i went to church for the first time in ages...kind of '...' how they were coincidentally talking about death...
pretty much the Priest was talking about how prepared we would be when death comes our way...
even if you always prepare for every exam, every work meeting, every single thing in your day, how prepared will you be when it's your final few minutes? things happen unexpectedly and for most situations you should just really be thankful that for you it wasn't so severe as it could be.
so how do we prepare ourselves for death?  for those with money and assets are you supposed to keep your will in check every week? for those with close family and friends are you supposed to ring them up every day to tell them 'I love you'?

i hope death goes away at this point. far far away...
i doubt it will be that serious and you'll come out fine. i guess this is just really going to be an eye-opener to the life you live at the moment. right now you're running back to your faith for support i guess it's just a peace of mind kind of thing something to give you hope to look out for those you love and yourself. even today's event shows you that you can't take things for granted. every action and move you make you must make with caution and 'use your brains', be aware of your surroundings and be aware of the risks. after this experience you'll change the way you live especially your outlook on life.i think you're going to be at home more often and more strict keeping those you love by your side just so you know that they aren't some place where something bad could happen to them.  after these few events i kind of wonder how i'm going to act from now on...i guess i'm going to be the same...cos what is the point in changing? but i think i'm going to be more cautious and possibly hermit this coming holidays. the outside world is dangerous =x as mother says...just stay at home!

this will definitely scar you and possibly give you a phobia. i don't know why this happened to you but i know you'll be fine. just be as strong as we know you are. today you really showed the grown up side of you even though you are still a kid, it's crazy to think you are still only so young and have matured so fast. i know it can be lonely at times for you but in the end you still are our baby. the pain in their faces today stunned me... to see your child in such pain and to see your child's body in such a state is the most heart breaking thing a parent and sibling could go through. just stay safe and a whitelighter will heal you in no time :)

state of the gorgon's castle :(

everything will get better in the end, i do believe that. this is just a bump in the road

v. twenty six poses

so...recently i've started bikrum yoga!

the first time almost died. i gave up half way and waited for the floor poses with jess. teressa was sooooo good! she got through the whole thing!
the second time wasn't too bad :) much better! time flew by pretty fast and i got through the WHOLE thing ! YAY! jess went twice that day and brought jackie. haha jackie hated it soooo much =\ so i think she's going to stick to shemoves ;)
and the third time was going to be at eight am but it was full :( so instead we went breakkies :)
but yeah going to go at four pm today with my mother and sister :) i think mother and sister are going to die.

bikrum is actually pretty fun. the amount you sweat is so ewww but it's worth it !
should have a bikurm yoga date with everyone :$

on other notes...

miniature pug x beagle 

i have one more exam left on tuesday then i am done! but i think i might flunk this one :( dynamics isn't exactly the easiest subject >.< and i don't have stupid alan kan nearby =[
after exams, it is allllllll dynasty and paper work for 2011.
from the video that cat posted, dj moto sounds pretty good =) kinda exciting!

and...i don't think i'm going overseas anymore to USA/Europe. at this stage, the trip has pretty much been cancelled. so much money lost :( but oh wells as long as he gets better that's all that matters right? :) so christmas in perth ! orrr...might go singapore for a bit! i want to dye my hair!!!!!!!
i'm supposed to be starting to go church every weekend from now on . . . i haven't been in sooo long =\
anddd... yay might be getting a dog or two :):) i want a miniture pugg hehe they're sooo cute! but papa wants a retriever =\ they're so big =[



and lastly...


happy birthday jono !