o.arrive

so the day has finally arrived. i have no idea what to do.
i don't know what's going to happen
i don't know what choices will be made

i want you to make up your mind on what you want and how much you want it.
don't lie to yourself and others. because others can see and read you like a book.
if you want something go for it. you may end up with what you want.
what you want to believe and make yourself think is different from what you really do know and feel.

remember to consider people and their feelings, they're human, they aren't stupid, they're not some trophy you win to put on the shelf. to clear things up. i guess that IS what is needed but how i'm still unsure.

i could hurt you. i know i can. and i don't want to. i don't want to hurt you or to make you sad.
that is what i'm scared of :( i think that is probably the thing holding me back most.

am i supposed to just be bold and ask? or, am i supposed to just leave it and let you think what you do?
some people don't think it'd work. some people do. so what am i supposed to do?
*sigh :(