V.wtf?

everything is so stupid. we still live in a high school drama. and i doubt it'll ever end.

similar

everyone is different for a reason,
when you start mimicking someone else,
and becoming that someone else,
what's the point in being around anymore?
we only need one of you.
one is more than enough.

~~~~~xo~~~~~

you and him.
so much difference.
yet similarly,
you both disappoint me in the same way.
gtfo.
just like he did.

V.drift

i don't know how i feel about you at the moment. you've changed. you've become exactly like someone else. you  don't have anything about you that's different. really...you've really lost... you. it's hard to watch you change this much without even realising it yourself. i don't think you realise what you could be missing out on or are starting to lose at the moment. do you know why? because you don't take into consideration the effort others make for you. if you don't reciprocate sooner or later, they aren't going to be bothered anymore. and in the end, you wonder who really is going to be there for you at the end of the day and whether that person or people are the right influence. you're drifting...


spring is drawing near ! :)
poor you if you suffer from hayfever !
september blogs begin soon

Q.笑

so i put on my make up,
put a Smile on my face.
and if anyone asks me,
everything is ok.
i'm laughing coz no one knows the joke is on me.
but i'm dying inside with my pride
and a smile on my face,
singing la la la...

title

your title to the world, is it that important?

once you change that title, everything else changes with it.

and those changes won't necessarily be for the best

if you're happy with where you are and where you're heading,

i don't see a point in changing that status/title,

because in the end, is that change really for you?

or for you to justify to everyone else what you have.

~~~~~xo~~~~~

once we walk out that door,
i no longer hold that title,
i no longer have that status,
you no longer have to please me,
but will you keep doing so?

twin

last weekend > this weekend

my twin didn't even rock up :(
jackie got kicked out =o

annie got kicked out =o

jen didn't reach her easy mode -.-

alan came to metros :)

i think i need a break from metros. it's gotten boring again :(

that two week break will make me enjoy the next time i go way more :)

to wait out till asia cocktail ? we'll see :)

but fail weekend as predicted =\

msu ball

to go or not to go?

o.helpless

it's funny how helpless some boys can feel when dealing with a girl.

they don't understand why we act certain ways. why we're suddenly moody. 

they don't know whether to assume it's that time of the month, or there something is really wrong.

they don't want to do or say anything wrong in fear of us raging. 

one minute we'll be all smiley, the next ... =X

crazy much ! poor stupid cans:O

it's scary to think how much has changed between us. it's scary to think how different it is. and even though all it needs is making the effort to communicate and make time. it's harder than you think. there is too much in the past to think about and dwell on. there is too much we know of each other to really move on properly. there is too much baggage for there to be any real trust and reliance. if we're not going to be straight with one another i don't see the point in making that effort. it's not that i don't want to make the effort, it's more like i don't want to make an effort that is just going to go to waste in the end. what's the point in going through all that when i know it'll just go back to the way it was. eos. you've changed. i've changed. but as to what kind of change, we can only judge ourselves.

hearsay

hearsay is a rather annoying thing to deal with

everyone has their own interpretation 

and the information you get could be far from the truth

~~~~~xo~~~~~

when i hear things from other people,
whether truth or not,
i can shake it off,
not pay any attention to it,
pretend like it was nothing.
but when i hear you say so from your mouth,
it cuts right through my heart,
into the depths of my soul.

closure

is what is needed,
is what we have,
is still to come,
there are too many loose ends left untied
all you need is this to move on with your life

~~~~~xo~~~~~

move out of my memories,
move out of my mind.
remove your things,
remove your belongings,
so i can close the door of my heart on you,
and never open it back up again.

neverending

the cycle will never end.the effort you make is taken for granted, hurting you is the choice i make, the choices i make it's not for only me but also for the choices that you have made, the chemistry is irreplaceable that i won't deny, your desires still present and your hope never fading. 

i'm really truly sorry what you have to go through. i know it must be hard for you, but what you have is worth it. i'm glad you're happy and i hope you don't let your doubts cloud your vision. don't doubt your importance to him. don't think about how high up you are on that list. just cherish what you have together :)

unfair

you assume too much and the amount of crap you give to one over the other is unfair.
both are in the wrong, whether one is expected to act this way and is predictable doesn't justify that the other is more wrong because they 'should' know better.
you assume that that person knows and observes but really that person knows shit all. that person doesn't live life analyzing every single thing that comes their way. that person lives life as it comes and doesn't realise what happens to them until it turns into one messy mess. then that person is left in a cycle with loose ends and no closure.

time is off the essence. figure it out for yourself.

now

now is the time to know, now is the time to make a decision,

now is the time for you to discover what you want with him,

it's your choice at the end of the day

and what you choose will change things no matter what.

~~~~~xo~~~~~

it's a lot harder slacking when you have a billion things to do a day.

everything has to be done NOW.

now. now. now.

sigh,

now-me has so many problems that i cannot rely on future-me like i used to.

average. =(

V.fail fruits

apple failed and went to metros before the date clearly stated :( but it was worth it :)
metros was really good last night! barely any trance at all! yay to california girls! jess came out with me for jackie! i hope they had a good time :):) epic love to dearest jackie who brought her whole till ;)
orange went missing :( plum got caught up -.- apple was told to go save plum but then got told to f-off by strawberry.

next weekend....ronnie/zhida/sarahs :) the 20s:)

Q.喜

you really put the life back into my dull shell of nothingness... =)

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

...i'll miss you....

baggage

hopefully for my sake you're able to deal with the amount that is about to come your way :)

~~~~~xo~~~~~

pack your bags and off you go!
come back soon 'cause i'll miss you =(

O.REALISATION

wow i think that...

you have finally turned into what i said you could have turned into.
what i said in the past, has become present in the future.

amazing much? but for your sake, you should hope that that really isn't the case.

LOL funny:)

o.it's a date!

things are slowly falling into place:)
i think it's quite exciting!
change for the better? we shall see.
to keep in contact, to make things work, to make things happen
you've been booked out :)




--
uni is fail. killing me. hate it. mfl i hate you. 2140 i hate you. law i like you i guess. dynamics i hate you too.
september will be such a good month :) 11th - return to metros 24th - another night out for asia cocktail
then october comes 1st - msu ball 2nd - metros 7th - nineteen 8th - twin's nineteen and noobs go ping

plans

when you plan too much,

and the result comes out to be contrary to what you had in mind,

you'll be disappointed.

and that sucks.

~~~~~xo~~~~~

i've always been told to plan ahead,
to always think about the consequences.
but you need to take risks and make those mistakes
to learn to know what it is that is exactly right for you.
and what it is that you want ;)

11TH SEPTEMBER

return to metrocity.

attention

it's inevitable. the split.

do you think you can handle it?

sharing that is

~~~~~xo~~~~~

mine?
It's with yu.
Yeh.
Give it back.

o.oneitis

oneitis is so fking ave

o.no regrets :)

before the buzzer sounds, hopefully you've lived life with no regrets :)


grown ups is such a sweet movie :) josh and i have decided we are all gonna have a huge family roadtrip in the future just like they did! it's gonna be major fun with everyone with their husbands/wives + children! whee good times ahead :):)


it's scary thinking about growing up. being realistic, the average girl will want to start a family around 25 years old =\ that's like less than a decade away :( scary much! if you don't find someone during uni, by the time you graduate you are like what? 21? for me 24 :( then you gonna spend like 2/3 years together before you even contemplate marriage at that age  =\


--
mama is back :) i realised with them around i stay grounded cos i come home and stay at home. don't stay out late to go eat don't have friends over to watch movies don't have a craving for sleep. i want holidays back too!

cruel intentions

you wanna know why? because i don't trust myself with you.
end of story.

steamboat

steam boat today :) channy bought rump steak instead of sliced =\ so noob but how cute! haha! he made kaseng some steak which wasn't too bad actually! so many people so many laughs so much food :)

thing learnt today: sago purposely distracts kaseng to kill his train of thought

happy birthday nj and mr kaseng! hope you both had fantabulous days!

uni is gross. it's killing me, thank the lord for alan kan! i'll be very sad face the day he gets oneitis :(
don't get oneitis alan >=( i will slap you!
sago doesn't have oneitis so i don't see why you should catch the disease :x PURITY<3

contemplating whether to go out tomorrow night =\ should i go out, and have a no-metros night? or just have a weekend in watching movies and lectopia that would be much more fun i think and relaxing! :)
what to choose :o

i love the way you lie.

september:)

interesting blogs :)

Q.痛

因为只有你能让我如此痛苦.

Q.假

never have i been so happy to say...

it's almost wednesday!!

=)

yayyy~

i get to see people.
non-customer-demanding-i-want-food people
=D

<3 CS crew for visiting today ^^

o.voice

ive lost my voice :(
speaking has really become an important way to communicate
it's so hard not to speak and it's so hard to not be heard :(
maybe it is karma =\
hopefully not.


lol josh =x
oops i did it again 
i played with your heart
got lost in the game
im not that innocent

Q.忙

never have i felt so busy in my life.
never have i felt like there is just not enough time.. for ANYTHING.

i really miss seeing people.
=(

<3 ness&sago&merv;visited today
<3 lammy&chan;visited last week
<3 lyndon;the week before

i need readjusting.

hurt me

-courtesy of ernst

HURT ME - NE YO

On a mission to make me feel it
All she wanna do is hurt me
Shorty’s only concern is that I fall

She’s determined to kill me softly
And I think she knows it’s working
But what’s sad is that I deserve it all

‘Cause I brought her life to an end
And now all she wants is revenge

All she wanna do is hurt me

Make me play her game

All she wanna do is hurt me

She wants me to feel pain

I tried to say I’m sorry

But that don’t mean a thing

All she wanna do is hurt me

All she wanna do is hurt me, yeah

 didn’t mean to do what I did

I didn’t know that this would happen

And if I never, ever love again

It’ll be exactly what she wanted from me

Cold Blooded

Oh

Cold Hearted

Oh

We never started

Oh

[…]

Oh