distance

i should leave some distance in between us.
we were never really meant to be,
you always find a way to hurt me somehow.
and whether you do it on purpose, you don't notice it,
or just that you simply don't care,
i don't know.
let's give each other some space. some time.
pretty sure i can live without you.

~~~~~xo~~~~~

it will have to be kept if things aren't going to be sorted out,
if something were to come from this, would we have regretted not keeping it
and just playing ignorance is bliss?
they say "distance only makes the heart grow fonder"
who knows anymore . . .

lost

lost as to what to do

lost as to what you want

lost as to what is the right thing

lost as to whether to take a chance

lost as to whether to bother

lost as to what i want

lost as to what is going to happen now

being lost sucks.

o.arrive

so the day has finally arrived. i have no idea what to do.
i don't know what's going to happen
i don't know what choices will be made

i want you to make up your mind on what you want and how much you want it.
don't lie to yourself and others. because others can see and read you like a book.
if you want something go for it. you may end up with what you want.
what you want to believe and make yourself think is different from what you really do know and feel.

remember to consider people and their feelings, they're human, they aren't stupid, they're not some trophy you win to put on the shelf. to clear things up. i guess that IS what is needed but how i'm still unsure.

i could hurt you. i know i can. and i don't want to. i don't want to hurt you or to make you sad.
that is what i'm scared of :( i think that is probably the thing holding me back most.

am i supposed to just be bold and ask? or, am i supposed to just leave it and let you think what you do?
some people don't think it'd work. some people do. so what am i supposed to do?
*sigh :(